#that one was more like actual smut ig and this one is just bullying him | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dudeandduchess · 3 years ago

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Rengoku Kyōjurō x F!Reader: Butterflies (Modern AU, Fluff, Smut)

Note: Something from the vault, as a thank you for everyone who supported Taro and myself. Hope you bbys like it! 🥰 Word Count: 9,856 words

Summary: (Y/n) gets reunited with her old crush, only to find out that he actually felt the same all those years ago. Sparks fly and relationships pick up.

Warnings: Smut, Adult Themes, Cunnilingus, Drinking (Party Games), Vaginal Fingering

***

Numerous voices flitted in and out of the restaurant that (Y/n) sat in; people buzzing about, friends laughing and dining to their heart’s content.

It was all so mundane, but still so fascinating. Especially when all of those people generated profit for her. And it was made even better by the fact that she was actually happy to be there— to be back home and be surrounded by what was comfortable and familiar.

Of course, she also decided to kill two birds with one stone and set up small get-togethers with her old friends that still lived around the area. Never in her wildest dreams did she think that her friends from college would care that much about her; but they proved her wrong with how much effort they put in to spend time with her.

(Y/n) was never the most popular young woman in school, but she was well-liked by a good number of people— especially after she burst out of her shell during her senior year. Initially, she had been the brunt of most of the tasteless jokes that her good-for-nothing classmates spewed, but come their last year, she had had enough and started to fight back— trading barbed words with even more lethal insults and taking no shit from anyone.

It all sounded like such a fairy-tale, but it was true; some professors had even joked about it and told her that she had emerged from being bullied to being the bully. Of course, she took that with a smile on her face— because it was never said with ill-intent; one could even say that her teachers were proud of her for standing up for herself.

“Hey, (Y/n), are you even listening?” One of her friends, [Friend 1’s name], snapped her fingers in front of the young woman’s face— which had the aforementioned woman jumping in her seat and blinking rapidly as she focused on the two others with her.

She grinned sheepishly and shook her head. “Sorry, I was just thinking about something.”

“Don’t tell us that you’re still thinking about work. You have to stay here for a while before you get bored again and go searching for the next up and coming food trend, hotshot chef,” Another one of her friends teased with a playfully sarcastic tone, that didn’t fail to make (Y/n) laugh.

“Hotshot chef,” she scoffed. “You’re making it sound like I do such exciting things other than slave over a stove all day.”

“Well, that might not be the most fun job, but you have to admit that getting to travel to eat food is fun,” [Friend 1] quipped with a shrug, then took a sip of her tea. “Just like Kyōjurō-san.”

“What about Kyōjurō? I haven’t kept up with any news since I moved away; like zero news, nada, zip, zilch,” (Y/n) admitted with a shrug, briefly thinking about the blond haired boy that she sat next to for two years straight. They had become friends, but weren’t close enough to spend time together outside of school if it didn’t concern projects.

“Aren’t you friends on social media? Do you not follow him on IG?” [Friend 1] practically screeched, which had (Y/n) wincing.

With a shake of her head, the (h/c) haired young woman answered, “No. I didn’t add or follow any people that I wasn’t extremely close to. Hell, he might not even remember me.”

“Aho, (Y/n). Of course he’ll remember you— even if he already moved away to become some commercial model.” [Friend 1]’s statement made (Y/n) look up at her with wide, disbelieving eyes. “Well, he used to be, until he became a restaurant designer.”

“Kyōjurō? A… restaurant designer? No fucking way!” She muttered, her upper lip curling in skepticism. “The same guy that I kept pestering because it was fun? That guy?”

My Kyōjurō?

“Yeah. He was even there when we last had a reunion. You should totally follow him on IG.” (Y/n) didn’t even know who said that out of her tiny group of friends, because she was too busy staring down at her fruit tea to hide the fact that she was blushing at the possessive words that crossed her mind.

She may have had a tiny crush on him— that she was too shy to admit to anyone— back then… and until now, she realized.

‘Gods. You should get over your crush, (Y/n). It was just that… a crush.’

***

The moment that (Y/n) got home, she immediately got ready for bed and laid down under her covers after switching the lights off— then turned the a/c unit on and curled up against one of her extra pillows.

She had half a mind to just go straight to bed, but the call of what she and her friends had discussed before was way too tempting to pass up.

Initially, she just stalked Kyōjurō’s profile, until those thoughts of ‘what if’ and ‘should I’ kept flitting around in her mind. There were so many possibilities, and she wanted to know what would happen if she took the chance to actually initiate contact with him.

She added him up first, then moved over to IG to go through his feed. The first few pictures were of the view from highrises— which she found pretty, but didn’t really care for as she saw those kinds of views during her trips. What she was really interested in was seeing the part of his life that revolved around being a commercial model.

It didn’t take her long to find those posts that she had been dying to see. She browsed each picture individually; feeling a smile tug at the corners of her lips with every post that she viewed. Some were artfully sensual, while others were more concerned with showing off the merchandise that he was wearing— but she had to admit that he looked amazing in every photo.

And one of them had her laughing so loud that her stomach began to hurt. He just looked so weird holding up a toothpaste tube, with that million-watt smile, and those enigmatic eyebrows.

He looked so intense; as if he would pester anyone who dared to look at his ad and not buy the toothpaste.

He didn’t look very different from what he used to when they were in college; save for the muscles that filled him out very nicely. There was one picture, however, that she had such a hard time looking away from because it was, for lack of better word, hot.

It was a close up of his head, with the tips of his fingers artfully resting against his lips— as if he was just kissed and he was feeling the lingering touch of his partner’s lips.

“What I would give to be that partner, Kyōjurō,” (Y/n) muttered with a chuckle, then navigated back to the top of his profile and pressed the follow button. Out of curiosity, she checked the list of people he followed— tamping down a surge of jealousy when she saw that he followed back most of her friends from college.

Even though it was her fault for not keeping in touch with him, she couldn’t help but feel a little pissed. And that was the first time that she sincerely regretted not following up more with her old friends— even going as far as to mute their group chat because she didn’t want to be bothered by news about reunions, when she sure as hell didn’t want to see most of their old classmates.

She was just thankful that she had the excuse of constantly being overseas to tell them that she couldn’t go when people from her group of friends messaged her privately.

And speaking of her friends messaging her, the message notification bubble flashed at the top of her screen— making her narrow her eyes briefly, before she sighed.

Since you’re home, we’re setting up a small reunion. Is next week good with you?

(Y/n) wanted to say no, that she was busy, but busy with what exactly? She didn’t have any ‘important’ agenda that she had to attend to since she was technically on vacation, nor was she out of the country. She could tell them that she was busy with her restaurant, but they all knew that everything was set with her staff— after all, she had told them that earlier.

Knowing her friends, they would just go to her house and drag her out with them— kicking and screaming. So, with a sigh, she typed back:

Yeah, sure.

***

(Y/n)’s hands felt like a waterfall had suddenly started to emerge from her palms; she was sweating so much, that it was starting to get gross. Not even the incessant wiping against her pants did much good. She was thatapprehensive about seeing her old classmates.

Sure, she managed to grow a backbone during her last year of college, but the old (Y/n) was still going to be on everyone’s minds— she was sure of that. Most of the people there were going to be playing a sad rendition of the meek and quiet (L/n) (Y/n)— pursing her lips in an attempt not to cry as she was teased mercilessly.

Had it not been for Kyōjurō, she would have dropped out of that place way before their second year was through. He didn’t do anything drastic like fight off the gnats surrounding her, but he always shooed them away because they tended to linger close to her— that and she always thought that he really did have a bit of that savior complex.

She didn’t want to talk to him at first, because he seemed so intimidating to her— with his height and those sharp features of his; and his overall demeanor. He seemed like he was so much larger than life with his reputation following him wherever he went.

They belonged to different classes during their first year but, by some stroke of luck, they were placed in the same class on their next year. She knew about him— the brightest and most enigmatic person in their year; it was honestly hard to imagine someone on campus who didn’t know him and his adorable little brother.

So when he started talking to her, it took her by surprise. She was shaken to the core. Absolutely rattled.

He had called her by her last name at first, then had asked her if she had an extra pen— and she fumbled around in her case to hand him one of her extra pens. That was only the start of their ‘relationship’ as seatmates, though.

She was so shy and hesitant to initiate conversation with him at first, until—one day—she accidentally let out a string of curses that was less-than-appropriate for a young woman her age to say. His head immediately snapped towards her, and she looked back at him sheepishly; only to have him chuckle at her.

“You’ve got quite the mouth on you,” Kyōjurō teased good-naturedly, grinning at her before turning back to copying the lesson material that their professor was writing on the board. “Never thought you had it in you.”

“Why? Because I’m a young woman?” She half-snapped at him, then clicked her tongue in annoyance.

He looked back at her and quirked an eyebrow. “No, because you’re you.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean, Rengoku-san?”

“Kyōjurō— call me Kyōjurō. Rengoku-san is my father… well, that’s me too, but that makes me sound so old.”

A blush warmed her cheeks at that, and she snapped her attention back to her notebook. “I- whatever.”

“Okay.”

“Fine.”

“Sure.”

“Do you always have to have the last word?” (Y/n) muttered quietly, shooting the man an incredulous look.

Kyōjurō only returned the look with a smug grin. “Yes.”

He was so insufferable, in the most adorable way possible— and she hated to admit it. Not only did he help himself to losing the pens that he borrowed from her, but he also helped himself to her homework. Sometimes she would just come back to the room to see him with one of her notebooks— fervently scribbling down the homework material that they had been assigned the day before.

At first, she was mad and called him out on it, until she got used to it and just let it slide.

What was annoying to her at first started to become endearing though— and she had to keep reminding herself that it wouldn’t be wise to develop feelings for someone that she was sure would never like her like that.

She just wanted to be away from him— even if the thought of it sent a bitter taste rushing through her mouth.

By the time that their fourth—and last— year of college started, (Y/n) was sure that the gods really had it out for her. She might have done something to upset them in a past life, or maybe they just didn’t like her— because she found herself still sitting next to Rengoku Kyōjurō for most of their classes.

Of course, that was the year that she grew a backbone— so things changed. When before, during breaks, (Y/n)’s tormentors would hang around her, she had changed things up and was the one hanging around them and antagonizing them. It might have had to do with the fact that she had taken judo classes over the summer, or it might have been Kyōjurō’s words to her just before their last day before summer break.

She would never forget those words.

You seriously have to learn to defend yourself. If anyone messes with you, then just kick their butts.

What she didn’t know, however, was that there were still a few words that Kyōjurō had left unsaid:

I can’t be around to protect you forever, (Y/n).

“Hey, (L/n)! Long time no see!” (Y/n) almost jumped out of her skin when she was picked up in a bear hug. When her feet were back on the ground, she stepped away from the man in front of her and tried to place a name to his familiar face.

“Uzui Tengen,” the silver haired man pointed to himself, grinning widely as the (h/c) haired young woman’s mouth fell open in shock.

“Uzui-kun! What… happened!? You got so… buff!” (Y/n) exclaimed happily, reaching out and squeezing her old friend’s muscular arm. “Damn! Who broke your heart?”

Uzui laughed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her towards the restaurant that they had rented out for tonight. “I think you mean to ask whose hearts I broke.”

“Ooh, calm down, Uzui.” She pretended to fan herself with her hand, silently thankful that she had bumped into an old friend of hers instead of one of their other classmates. “Is it just me or is it getting hot in here?”

He just guffawed at that, shaking his head and pulling (Y/n) closer to him. “Ne, (L/n), don’t take this the wrong way, but you sound really… err…”

Her genuine smile tightened. “I sound different; weird. It’s because I mostly use English to communicate. To be honest, this is the most that I’ve used japanese in ten years.”

“Oh yeah, you moved around with your dad. How was life over there? What are you working on now?”

“Well… it was tough adjusting to everything at first, but I eventually got used to it. Life over there was so much fun; like really fun. A lot. And I’m a-” (Y/n) was cut off by loud cheering as she entered the building. She initially thought that it was directed towards her, only to look up and find what the source of the cheers were.

Rengoku Kyōjurō had just entered with one of their other classmates— Shinazugawa Sanemi.

Butterflies immediately flooded her stomach, and she bit her bottom lip to keep herself from doing something stupid— like calling out his name.

“Heyyyyyy! It’s (Y/n)! You finally made it!” Various versions of these words rang in the young woman’s ears, but she couldn’t pay them much attention because Kyōjurō’s eyes were locked on hers. She tried for a weak smile, which she feared made her look stupid, and he returned it with a small smile of his own.

It had been ten years since she had last seen Kyōjurō, but her 27-year-old heart still beat frantically as if she was a young teenager all over again.

***

“Come on, (Y/n)! Do it for me?” [Friend 2] pleaded with her hands clasped together in front of her, making puppy dog eyes at the (h/c) haired young woman in front of her. “Just this game and the truth or drink game later. I promise!”

As much as (Y/n) didn’t want to join in on whatever this game was going to be, she found herself nodding and getting dragged to the middle of the room by [Friend 2]. [Friend 1] stood at the front of the room and asked the boys and young womans to form two lines of five people each.

Once everyone was in place, [Friend 1] asked everyone to face whoever was across from them on the other line— and it took everything in (Y/n) to not bolt out of the line when she saw that it was Kyōjurō.

He shot her a lopsided smile, and she bit the inside of her cheek before looking at her friend who was making her way down the line, and passing square foil packets to the people on her side of the room.

Another one of their classmates distributed bananas to the people on the other line; and as [Friend 1] explained the mechanics of the game, most of the participants blushed profusely, while others laughed.

(Y/n), however, was speechless. She wanted nothing more than to sit this game out, but [Friend 2]’s presence from beside her kept her where she was.

[Friend 1] instructed the people with the bananas to put it between their thighs, and they followed— some a bit more reluctantly than others; while the people on (Y/n)’s side walked forward and got down on their knees in front of their respective partners.

She couldn’t even look at Kyōjurō as she sank down to her knees in front of him, meekly opening the foil packet and trapping it between her lips— like her friend was prattling off.

The objective of the game was to see who could get the condom on the banana the fastest; only using their mouth. Was it risqué? Yes.

(Y/n) had been trying to avoid talking to Kyōjurō all night, not because she didn’t like him— but because she was absolutely mortified that even after ten years, she still had feelings for him. Even after all the boyfriends and the flings she had, she was still reduced to awkward teenage feelings with just one look from him.

From where he stood, Kyōjurō was absolutely flustered on the inside. He didn’t have a penchant for public sex, but he could feel himself getting hard at just the sight of (Y/n) kneeling in front of him with that condom between her lips.

At the rate that his erection was rising, she wouldn’t have to put it on the banana. He almost wanted to groan aloud and rub a hand over his face, but resisted the urge to do so.

The hostess of the game, whose name was [Friend 1]— if he remembered correctly— gave the signal to start the game, and his focus was instantly pinned to the (h/c) haired young woman in front of him. His eyes watched her intently as she managed to hook the condom to the blunt end of the banana, before she pulled away and looked up into his eyes.

Her cheeks grew even redder, which had Kyōjurō chuckling. However, his laughter was cut off when she opened her mouth and slowly sank down on the banana— eyes darting up at him once more as she rolled the condom down in one smooth move.

If he was semi-hard before, he was rock hard at that moment. He wanted nothing more than to take his cock out and use it to fuck her mouth until he came. A quiet whoosh of breath left him as he cursed, “Fuck me.”

To say that everyone was surprised that (Y/n) and Kyōjurō were the first pair to finish was the understatement of the century. Everyone was gawking at the (h/c) haired young woman as the blond put a hand on her elbow to help her stand.

“That was so wild, (Y/n)-chan!” Uzui hollered teasingly from the sidelines, chuckling along with the people who found his comment funny. Kyōjurō, however, didn’t see what was so amusing with what the other man had said, and narrowed his eyes at the taller male.

It was a clear warning for Uzui to back the fuck off.

(Y/n)’s tormentors didn’t dare show their faces at the reunion, but that didn’t give Uzui the freedom to step in their place— unless he wanted both Kyōjurō’s and (Y/n)’s wrath to fall upon him.

Before Kyōjurō could apologize to (Y/n) on behalf of Uzui, she had already walked off to the sidelines— ensconcing herself within a few of her friends’ presence.

It would have been fine with him, had one of the guys over there not wrapped an arm around her shoulders and not playfully palmed the top of her head. He wanted to break that guy’s hand… and his arm for touching what wasn’t his.

As promised, the (h/c) haired young woman found herself sitting at the table with a shot glass in front of her. [Friend 1] had filled it up to the brim with whiskey, and (Y/n) found herself staring at it apprehensively.

“Okay, the name of the game is truth or drink. You either tell the truth or you drink, simple.” [Friend 2] piped up enthusiastically. “We’re going to go around with the questions, but I’ll start. If you had to sleep with one person in this room, who would it be?”

Oh hell no. She cursed inside her head, discreetly letting her gaze flit over to Kyōjurō who was on the other side of the table— just two seats away from her.

The blond seemed to have picked up on the attention that was being given to him, so he looked over to where (Y/n) was— biting back a smirk when he saw her quickly glance away from him.

He was glad that he wasn’t the only one whose head—and libido— was being messed with by the damn reunion.

A few people downed their shots, and Kyōjurō watched as (Y/n) picked up the shot glass and downed the contents in one go; making a face as she set the glass back down on the table.

He had to admit that he was disappointed that he wasn’t going to find out what her answer was— even though he had an inkling that it was going to be his name that would have passed from those sinful lips of hers.

He was starting to get hard—again— with just the thought of all the things that he wanted to do to her; and as much as he wanted to tell her that he had ten years’ worth of pent up sexual fantasies to fulfill with her, he wrapped his fingers around the shot glass in front of him and downed the whiskey— his eyes never leaving her face all the while.

Those who didn’t take their shots started prattling their answers off, and before they knew it, the next person was already asking the question after some glasses were refilled with more whiskey.

“What’s your biggest turn-on?”

A handful of people drank their shots, and Kyōjurō half-expected (Y/n) to drink her shot again but— to his surprise and utter delight— she merely exchanged a shrug and a giggle with [Friend 2] who was beside her. He didn’t even listen to what everyone’s answers were, except for when it was her turn.

She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again when [Friend 1]— who was on her other side— slapped her shoulder with a laugh. He found that a bit annoying because he was practically on the edge of his seat, yet they kept delaying her answer. Until… “Rough sex, dirty talk, and Daddy kink.”

Kyōjurō had to swallow thickly and lick his suddenly-dry lips at her answer, because she had basically taken his top kinks and laid them bare in front of everyone. Before he knew it, it was already his turn to answer; he turned to (Y/n) once more, unabashedly staring at her as a small buzz from his first shot warmed his veins. “Women who love rough sex and dirty talk… with a Daddy kink.”

(Y/n)’s face warmed up even more at Kyōjurō’s answer, biting down on her bottom lip as she averted her gaze from his own intense stare. A few more people admitted their turn-ons, but she paid them no mind as she tried to ignore the intense gaze that her college crush was pinning her under.

“The person you want to kiss the most right now?”

A lot of people knocked back their drinks, while the few brave souls who were either already drunk or tipsy enough to admit something so personal babbled on about their ‘person’.

(Y/n), however, wrapped her fingers around the tiny shot glass and hesitated a bit as she subtly let her gaze flicker from the amber liquid to Kyōjurō, then back again. She deduced that she wasn’t drunk enough to deal with the possible consequences of saying his name, so she lifted the glass up and knocked back the contents with a grimace.

Her friends slapped her shoulders as they razzed her for being a tease, and Kyōjurō silently agreed with those sentiments— (Y/n) had been teasing him all night, whether it was intentional or not.

But he was done skirting around whatever was going on between them; he had waited so many years just to see her again, and he would be damned if he went home by himself tonight; just like all the other times that they had had a reunion without her.

She was here now, and that in itself was a miracle. Both of them were busy people, but her main job didn’t allow her to stay home for long— if at all— so he was going to take advantage of what time that he had, and he would try and fuck her out of his system once and for all; if that was even the solution to his feelings for her.

So, when it was his turn to answer, he looked directly at the (h/c) haired young woman and smirked. “(L/n) (Y/n).”

A chorus of catcalls and hollers sounded at the table, while (Y/n) could only cast a dumbfounded stare at him from where she sat. Her friends roughly shook her by her shoulders, but she paid them no mind as she tried to let Kyōjurō’s words sink in; but it was like her brain was done trying to comprehend what was happening, and just full-on gave up on her, which left her with a high-pitched beep that was not unlike the sound of a heart monitor flat-lining.

She was either dead and in limbo, or she was dreaming— because no way in hell or heaven would Rengoku Kyōjurō like her like that.

It was true that they had become closer than most during their seatmate days, but she never got any indication from him that he ever even looked at her as more than a friend.

And this development certainly was very unexpected. Like, extremelyunexpected, to the point that she put more weight to the rumor that the world would implode back in 2012 rather than this.

She was shaken from her stupor, however, when a heavy hand clapped her on the shoulder before gliding along the base of the back of her neck as an arm was wrapped tightly around her. Uzui pressed his face close to hers, a drunken grin stretching over his teeth before he leaned in— unabashed with his intentions while everyone at the table looked on in wonder and disbelief as (Y/n) turned her face to the side to dodge his lips.

Uzui pouted as he pulled his lips away from one corner of (Y/n)’s lips. He was overselling being drunk, but he wanted both (Y/n) and Kyōjurō to just get on with things— even if he had to be the bad guy. “C’mon, (Y/n)-han, kissing me is almost the same as kissing Rengoku.”

On the outside, Uzui looked like he was drunk out of his mind, but Kyōjurō knew better. The larger man could hold much more than his weight in alcohol, and a few beers wasn’t going to make him act like he currently was; Uzui was merely trying to rile him up, and gods help him, it was working.

“I…” (Y/n) let out a nervous laugh that showed how uncomfortable she really was, and Kyōjurō clenched his right hand where it rested atop the table as he reigned his temper in.

He wanted nothing more than to pummel the other man’s face for touching what was his, but he couldn’t do that at the risk of scaring (Y/n) off. He wasn’t opposed to beating Uzui to a pulp for pulling that with (Y/n), but never in front of the young woman that he liked. “I don’t think it works like that, Uzui-kun.”

His silver haired friend shot him a smug grin, as he made [Friend 1] scoot over to make some space for him, then made himself at home beside the (h/c) haired young woman— not once taking his arm off of her.

“Go away, Uzui, you’re not even playing,” Kyōjurō practically growled at the taller man, which had the aforementioned shrugging nonchalantly.

“I can take (Y/n)-chan’s shots for her.”

“That ruins the purpose of the game, aho,” Kyōjurō shot back, narrowing his eyes in a glare.

Uzui smiled as he turned to (Y/n)— uncomfortably close to her face, in the young woman’s opinion. “You want me here, right, (Y/n)-s… chan?”

“She doesn’t.”

“Coming from you, Rengoku, but I want to hear it from those pretty lips of hers,” Uzui kept on teasing, flustering her to the point that her face felt like it was sunburnt from the intense sun in the Sahara.

The argument between the two was getting a bit tedious to everyone who just wanted to get on with the game, so [Friend 1] rapped her fist roughly against the wooden surface of the table to get everyone’s attention. “Let’s just get on with the game, shall we? You three can just fix your lovers’ spat later.”

(Y/n) widened her eyes in warning at her friend, wanting to flip her off for putting a label on whatever the hell was happening between Rengoku and Uzui, and her— regardless of the fact that it was said in jest— because it put her in an even more awkward situation.

She was never that close with Uzui, and had only began to talk to him more during the tail end of their senior year. It was just that Uzui was so gung ho with everyone; that was why he was basically everyone’s friend.

At least, the people he deemed worthy of his attention were his friends.

With that, the game went on with (Y/n) trying to ignore Uzui as much as possible, until he started cracking cringe-worthy jokes at her that had her snorting and eventually giggling along with him.

Of course, her mind still drifted over to Kyōjurō who kept on casting his friend a glare every once in a while; his playful mood completely gone as he watched Uzui make (Y/n) laugh at his stupid jokes and anecdotes. No one even dared to call Kyōjurō out for avoiding the game altogether, because it was quite evident on his face that his attention was elsewhere.

Once the game was over and people had dispersed into little groups from the long table in the very middle of the room, (Y/n) broke off from the crowd to get a bottle of water from the cooler that someone had stowed all the non-alcoholic drinks in, before slinking out into the cool night.

Her face was still warm as the familiar and mildly uncomfortable buzz of alcohol heated her veins, and she pressed the cold bottle to her right cheek while she made her way towards the low sea wall at the very edge of the property.

Living so close to the sea did have its good points, namely having unlimited access to something so soothing for free— and as much as she wanted to take a dip in the water to cool her down, she wasn’t that stupid or drunk enough to think that she could swim back to shore if the waves managed to drag her out to the open waters.

If (Y/n) were to be completely honest, she would say that she hated growing up in her hometown. She had felt so trapped and repressed because she always saw the same things and followed a routine, no matter how much she tried to change it up by adding interests and new agendas every once in a while, but the fact didn’t change that she was still stuck in the same old place, with the same old people, and the same dreams of leaving and never coming back.

Still, most of those feelings of contempt were replaced by a deep-seated appreciation for the very place that she thought was the bane of her existence. Her home had helped shape her into the person that she was now, only being made better with a few adjustments here and there with every place that she visited.

For once, her heart felt at ease in her little place by the sea; at ease, but still not truly belonging because no matter how she tried, she would never truly belong to one place. All because she had left small fragments of herself in every place that she went.

The fact made her simultaneously happy and sad, so she tried to wash down the unsavory feeling of sadness with a few gulps of water.

She didn’t know how long she stood there on the sand, just looking out into the darkness while listening to the soothing rendition of the waves gently rolling into the shore— truly lost in her own world, until she heard heavy footfalls crunching the sand beneath their shoes.

(Y/n) cast a glance over her shoulder to see who the intruder was, ready to dismiss them immediately, until she saw Kyōjurō’s trademark blond and red hair. A small smile tugged at her lips, even as her heart practically pounded in her chest.

To say that she was nervous would be the understatement of the century, because she felt so much more than that; to the point that she would willingly toss herself into the ocean to avoid that heated gaze that Kyōjurō was currently subjecting her to.

The enigmatic man made his way to stand beside her, close enough for her to feel the warmth emanating from his body, but far enough to maintain an appropriate distance between them. No one said a word as both of them gazed at each other, not moving aside from blinking to refresh their irises every once in a while.

The only sounds that (Y/n) could hear were the gentle waves lapping against the shore, and the sound of her heart pounding in her ears. Until…

“I love you,” Kyōjurō began with a soft but firm tone. He seemed to hesitate, then added with a much gentler lilt, “I have loved you since we were in college.”

(Y/n) didn’t know what to say— how could she know what to say, when this was her long-time crush confessing his love to her even after ten years. Who even held on to feelings that intense for someone after that long?

He was probably confused and a bit overwhelmed with her presence, though she would usually refute that with a protest that it was just her. But she was grasping at straws in an effort to find a good rebuttal, and that was as good as she was going to get with the turmoil that her heart and head were currently in.

“I still love you, (Y/n).”

She had quickly drafted up an appropriate response to his confession, but all of that was seemingly thrown out the window as she asked dumbly, “Why?”

Instead of getting offended at her lackluster response, Kyōjurō’s lips quirked up at the corners in a small, charming smile that didn’t fail to take (Y/n)’s breath away. She knew that he was handsome— and it was one of the reasons that she developed a crush on him— but that smile was just too much. “Why not?”

He got her there. “Because I’m me, and you’re…” She waved a hand in his general direction, as if expecting that to get her point across. “You.”

Kyōjurō took a step towards her, his eyes not once leaving hers as he held her jaw between his thumb and index finger. A slight grin tugged at his lips, as he muttered, “Just shut up, ladybug.”

(Y/n) had to tamp down the butterflies that started fluttering around in her stomach at the familiar name. It wasn’t significant to her because she found them cute, but it was significant because it was the topic that they were discussing in class when the professor caught them chatting to each other instead of listening— which ended up with them getting kicked out of class that day.

It was the most fun hour that they had together, as they had spent the remaining time before their next class in the library— just talking and hanging out with each other.

He had taken to calling her that when she rambled, and it was always effective in shutting her up; though, she was in for a treat because she was going to discover a better way for Kyōjurō to get her to stay quiet.

She opened her mouth to speak, but the blond beat her to the punch and slanted his lips against hers; gently coaxing her mouth to move against his own, then snaking his tongue between her lips to play with hers.

Instead of tamping down years’ worth of sexual frustration into a manageable burn, the kiss only made Kyōjurō want (Y/n) more than he already did. The sexy little moans coming from her made his blood run hot and cold at the same time, and he could do nothing but pull her flush against his body, while wrapping an arm around her to keep her where she was.

His left hand pressed against the small of her back, before drifting down to her ass— going lower than what was appropriate so he could press the tips of his fingers against her clothed core.

The action had (Y/n) gasping against Kyōjurō’s mouth, tensing at first before practically melting against him once more when he started toying with her entrance. Her left hand gingerly made its way up to Kyōjurō’s side, hesitantly curling against the material of his shirt before sliding down to the unmistakable bulge in his pants.

Kyōjurō roughly bit down on her bottom lip when he felt a pleasurable jolt run up his spine when she gave his erection a squeeze. As much as he wanted to continue, though, he knew that this was hardly the place for his first time with (Y/n); he didn’t wait years just to do it with her in the dark— on a public beach, no less.

He wanted to take his time with her, see every curve and kiss every blemish that were once the topic of one of their conversations.

Kyōjurō felt her fingers starting to unsnap the button of his jeans, but he stepped away from her and broke their kiss— still keeping his lips a hairsbreadth away from her own pair that were red and slightly swollen because of him.

“Later,” the blond whispered softly, feeling his lips twitch up in a slight smirk before he leaned down and captured (Y/n)’s lips in another heated kiss.

She moaned against his mouth at that, melting further into him as his grip on her jaw slid down so that his hand was framing her neck possessively. “I’m going to fuck you until all you can think about is me and my cock.”

A pleasurable shiver wracked (Y/n)’s body, making her bite her bottom lip in anticipation of Kyōjurō’s promise.

Part of her wanted to burrow herself beneath the sand and forget that this ever happened, because she didn’t know how she was going to handle the curious looks and the snarky side comments that were sure to arise from their own classmates; to think that Rengoku Kyōjurō would even have feelings for someone as insignificant as her was such a laughable concept— one that no one could ever see coming.

She might have come out of her shell during her last year in college, but she still wasn’t remarkable or even memorable except to her own homeroom classmates. She wasn’t dumb or untalented, nor was she unlikeable, but she chose to remain on the sidelines during her years in college; finding that she needed a break from constantly trying to be the best at everything like she had been doing since she was young.

In truth, (Y/n) was very intelligent and had a wide range of talents— yet she chose to be lazy and prioritized just getting average marks so that she could pass each year without a hitch, which was why most people thought that they could push her around and make fun of her.

It was funny how life panned out for everyone, in the end.

While she was having the time of her life doing what she loved all while getting to travel to her heart’s content— on top of having a handful of friends that she considered as close brothers and sisters— the same couldn’t be said for the people who had made her younger years hell on earth.

She didn’t want to brag, but her life turned out great— her only problem was the lack of a steady relationship.

“You’re thinking too hard, ladybug. Candy for your thoughts?” Kyōjurō asked with a slight smile, gliding his hand up so that it was fondling (Y/n)’s left ass cheek, while his right hand drifted up and started gently tracing invisible lines across her jaw and part of her cheek.

The personalized idiom didn’t fly over her head though, which elicited a fond little smile to bloom on her face.

Her heart started beating double its regular pace, and she had to take a calming breath to try and soothe the uncomfortable feeling that her heart was about to jump out of her chest and grace them with its presence. She thought back on all the times that he would tell her that expression, and all the times that he would wave a piece of her favorite candy in front of her face to coax her into spilling her thoughts.

Kyōjurō had a penchant for always having candy in his pocket because he noticed that (Y/n) had quite the sweet tooth, so instead of bribing her with money, he would always bribe her with a piece of candy— especially when she didn’t want to let him borrow one of her pens, after he lost the last one he borrowed.

(Y/n) was about to answer, when a sudden moment of realization hit her, akin to a cast iron pan hitting her square in the face:

She was also in love with Rengoku Kyōjurō.

Everything that she did, she unknowingly did because of him. The most obvious point was her love for travelling because of him— because he had taken the time to teach her about Geology when she so clearly sucked at it; she was so horrible at the subject that she once thought that Malta was a city in Indonesia.

But now that she thought back on it, all the seemingly-irrelevant decisions that she made all revolved around Kyōjurō; she had gone to South Korea because he expressed a deep curiosity for the culture and the mandatory military service that they imposed upon the male populous.

She had also went to Easter Island, because she thought that it would be very cool to see the statues up close, but now she realized that her decision was unknowingly influenced by Kyōjurō’s words about wanting to go to the island someday. She knew that accepting going to such a place would bring a smile to Kyōjurō’s face.

She thought that she had forgotten all about her feelings for Kyōjurō but, as it turns out, those feelings had never even disappeared throughout the years; they had waned to the point that she didn’t even remember having them, but she now knew that they were still there— and they were more intense than ever.

Kyōjurō quirked his eyebrows up at her, before reaching up to smooth out the crease between her eyebrows that showed how deep in thought she really was. A coquettish grin lit up the blond’s features as he asked, “Is candy not enough anymore? An orgasm, then? An orgasm for your thoughts, (Y/n)?”

A blush stole up the young woman’s neck before it settled on her cheeks, and she halfheartedly swatted Kyōjurō’s abdomen with the back of her hand. “Aho.”

“I’m just trying to get you to-”

“Aishiteru.”

Now it was Kyōjurō’s turn to be dumbfounded. He had to blink twice as (Y/n)’s words settled in his brain. She found his expression sp adorable, that she had to stifle a giggle as she let out a humorous dig at him, “Do you want me to say it slower this time? Ai- shi- te-”

She couldn’t finish her sentence, because Kyōjurō had pulled her flush against his chest once more and roughly slammed his lips against hers— teeth clacking in the process which made both of them wince before melting into each other.

“You’re coming home with me. Now.”

***

Kyōjurō practically tossed (Y/n) on the queen-sized mattress that dominated his medium-sized room in the apartment that he and Uzui shared when they were both in the area.

The young woman landed with a dull thud and propped herself up with her hands so she could watch as Kyōjurō hastily discarded his clothes— haphazardly pulling his shirt over his head and kicking his pants off once he had unsnapped the button and lowered the zipper.

(Y/n)’s eyes were almost glistening with a lustful glee as she zeroed in on the sizeable bulge in the blond’s boxer briefs, and she pulled herself up against the stack of pillows by the headboard before bringing the index and middle finger on her right hand to her throbbing core.

She circled her clit over her pants, pressing roughly against the thick fabric as a needy moan left her lips. “I need your cock in me, Kyōjurō. Please.”

The plea that was tacked on to her request was Kyōjurō’s undoing— he wasn’t weak against pleading words in general, but this was (Y/n) that was begging for his cock, and all of his fantasies for the past few years didn’t even hold a candle to the real thing; her words made him feel weak in the knees, even as his dick twitched excitedly.

He then palmed himself over his underwear and slowly massaged his balls, groaning quietly as he gazed at (Y/n)’s fingers that were lazily rubbing herself through her shorts. “Take it off.”

“Take what off?”

This was hardly the time to be coquettish, as Kyōjurō wanted to fist her hair in his hand and fuck her mouth hard until she knew not to tease him, but he reigned his urges in; he had more time for that later— now, he had to get her ready for his cock. “Everything.”

“Yes, Kyō.”

More heat coursed throughout (Y/n)’s body, making her bite down on her lip as she took her sweet time unbuttoning her blouse before sliding the silky material off her shoulders, then let her gaze lock on Kyōjurō’s as she unbuttoned her shorts and slid them down her legs— kicking them off to the side of the bed with a quiet giggle that went straight to Kyōjurō’s cock.

He hadn’t taken her as the type of woman who would wear something as racy as a thong, but he sure as hell was not complaining, as he stared heatedly at the white scrap of lace that was covering her cunt from him.

A low grunt left Kyōjurō’s throat as he pounced on (Y/n), practically ravaging her lips as his hands deftly unhooked her bra and tossed it behind his shoulder. “Fuck, you’re still so slow.”

(Y/n) pulled away at the comment, placing a hand on the middle of her lover’s chest as she looked at him with a catty expression on her face. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused, now come on, let’s fuck.” It was said so breathlessly that it was almost funny, but neither of them could do anything as Kyōjurō tried to catch her lips once more. Only he was held back by the throbbing pain he felt where her hand was; she wasn’t choking him, rather she was digging her thumb and index finger into his collar bones— and had he been a lesser man, he would have crumpled in pain already.

“I didn’t come here to be insulted, Kyōjurō.”

“I wasn’t, promise. I’m sorry… I’ll make it up to you.”

Slowly, her hand trailed up over his shoulder before settling on the back of his neck— which she used to pull him down so that their lips were barely an inch apart.

Never in Kyōjurō’s long years of existence had he felt so aroused yet borderline intimidated at the same time. The way that her eyes were boring into him with an arctic veneer to them made his blood heat up and run cold at the same time, after all, that strong look in her eyes was one of the reasons that he had fallen for her in the first place.

“You better, Kyōjurō.” The way his name rolled off her tongue should have been illegal, because it made his cock throb painfully as he subtly pressed it against her hip.

Oh, I definitely will. He answered smugly in his head before leaning down and finally capturing her lips beneath his— prying her mouth open, before snaking his tongue inside to play with her own. She moaned against him, fingers curling against the back of his neck as she lost herself in the kiss.

It didn’t take long for Kyōjurō to slip her skimpy panties off, kicking the scrap of cloth off of the bed before he trailed his lips down (Y/n)’s body; laving her pert nipples with attention as he passed her breasts.

He then nestled his head in between her legs so that he could run his tongue up her wet slit, making (Y/n) moan aloud. And her sexy and pleased noises only had Kyōjurō smirking in satisfaction, especially as he sucked her clit into his mouth before nipping on it gently.

The blond let his fingers join in the foray after that, trailing his fingertips along her cunt before delving them inside her wet heat— curling them upwards to reach her g-spot.

And in practically no time at all, (Y/n)’s walls were tightening around him as a cry of pleasure was ripped from her lips. Her mewls and throaty moans were like music to his ears— especially when he heard her calling his name out as she came.

He was sure that he was never going to hear a sweeter sound than that.

***

((A few years later…))

“Kyōjurō,” (Y/n) drawled out in a whine, reclining back in her seat on the plush couch that she insisted she needed in her new apartment with her fiancé.

The aforementioned man didn’t even have to ask what she was going on about, because she had been pestering him about the same topic ever since their third anniversary the week before.

In all technicality, he had dropped little snippets of the reason why he went to their reunion that day but, apparently, that wasn’t enough for his little gremlin of a future-wife. She needed to know everything, and that in itself was an embarrassing topic for him; it made him cringe just remembering just how frantic he had been when he saw the posts from his college friends of them posing for pictures at (Y/n)’s mother’s new tea shop.

He sat down beside (Y/n), and her reaction was instantaneous—immediately climbing on to his lap and straddling him, all while wrapping her arms around his neck.

She then leaned in and brushed her lips gently against his, which earned a disgruntled groan from Kyōjurō. He knew all of her tricks by now and he was having none of it, even if his dick fell off with how he had been neglecting its sexual needs in the past few days.

(Y/n) was so underhanded that he wouldn’t put it past her to use sex as a leverage— so he had avoided it… as well as being underneath her since she had brought the topic up.

“Kyō!” (Y/n) whined again, bouncing up and down on his lap; effectively grinding her hips against his clothed erection with a devilish twinkle in her eyes. She knew damn well what she was doing, and it made Kyōjurō narrow his eyes at her. “Please?”

Unfortunately for (Y/n), her plea wasn’t going to work on him, so he placed his hands on either side of her waist before roughly pinning her down on the couch. A loud whoosh of breath escaped her parted lips, and her hands immediately flew down to cradle her lower abdomen. “You have to be careful; you don’t want to hurt our little bean, don’t you?”

Little bean? He wasn’t dumb, he instantly knew what she was talking about— yet he could only stare at her with a dumbfounded expression on his face. Slowly, a grin lit up her features as she raised her right hand up and cupped his cheek tenderly.

“You’re finally going to be a dad, Kyō.”

He had always wanted to have kids— a son first, then a daughter, if he had things his way— and his chest felt like it was going to burst with how full it felt with all the love and happiness that was coursing through him at that moment.

A multitude of questions were flitting through his head at the speed of light, but what he blurted out was the most pressing issue of all. “What about your job? You have to travel for your food research and-”

(Y/n) pressed her thumb gently against her fiancé’s lips to silence him, smiling when he affectionately kissed the pad of it. “I can take a gap year just to give birth to the little bean… or maybe stay put for a few years to be a stay at home mom. So you’ll have to design more of those fancy restaurants for your bougie clients, because I know you’re going to want to spoil the little bean.”

The last part about working more was a joke, but Kyōjurō agreed with that sentiment entirely; he couldn’t be nitpicky about projects like he currently was, because he wanted to give his and (Y/n)’s child everything— not to mention the fact that they still had to save up for their wedding.

“Kyōjurō,” the (h/c) haired woman beneath him patted his lips lightly with her thumb, shaking him from his reverie. “You were in la-la land for quite a bit back there. Candy for your thoughts?”

“I just…” he sighed, and then started chuckling as he tossed and turned the good news in his head. “I’m so happy that we’re having a baby. You’ve given me everything that I’ve ever wanted, (Y/n)… thank you.”

“I should be the one thanking you, silly.” She smiled softly, shooting Kyōjurō a sly wink that elicited another chuckle from him.

Silence reigned over the couple as they stayed there, content with just looking at each other and taking the other’s features to memory— even though both of them practically had the other’s features memorized by then. Until Kyōjurō broke the silence…

“I was in Tokyo— about to meet up with a client— when I was scrolling through my newsfeed, and when I saw a couple of photos of you with our old college friends, and when I was sure that you were back home. So I got on the first flight that I could so that I could see you,” The blond began softly, a blush coloring his cheeks as he averted his gaze slightly from his fiancée’s.

He took a deep breath, then continued, “Shinazugawa was not happy that I’d dragged him along only to chicken out at the last minute— so we stood at the first floor of the building that your restaurant is in… and I looked like a raving lunatic down there because I kept pacing and running my hands through my hair. I wanted to see you but, at the same time, I couldn’t muster up the courage to walk up those stairs.”

(Y/n)’s heart was racing in her chest, and a wide grin stretched over her teeth as she waited for her lover to continue— and he didn’t disappoint. “I felt like crap, so I stayed at home and tried to think of a way to see you without coming across as a creepy stalker, and that was when [Friend 1] sent the message in the group chat about you being home and being up for a reunion.”

Another short bout of silence, and (Y/n) was about to speak, when Kyōjurō resumed his narrative. “Gods, you were so beautiful when I saw you walking in that building; I wanted nothing more than to kiss you then and there. But I had to hold back, of course— because I didn’t know if you felt the same way about me.”

Softly, like a feather gliding against his cheek, Kyōjurō felt (Y/n)’s thumb drift over his heated skin— yet he still leaned in towards her warm touch.

“You mean being head over heels in love with you?”

In any other moment, he wouldn’t have admitted it, but this was different— and he knew that whatever he said here wouldn’t be used as teasing material against him, so he found himself softly uttering, “Desperately in love with you.”

“Well, Rengoku Kyōjurō, I hope you know now that I’m desperately in love with you, too.”

Kyōjurō grinned at than, and he leaned down to press his lips lightly against his fiancée’s lips. She was already a few months away from marrying him and, on top of that, she was carrying his child— if that didn’t mean that she reciprocated his feelings, then he didn’t know what did. “I know that now, (Y/n).”

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sunshineseung · 4 years ago

Text

Little Secret Part 2 // Changbin

🍄 | genre: smut mini-series ☁️ | pairing: Seo Changbin x female!reader 🌿 | wc: 3.6k 🌸 | includes: virgin!reader, kinda romantic, lots of smoochin’, lil bit of begging, reaaally soft sex, oral (f!receiving), consent :), protected sex, aftercare? ig

v Please read part one first! v

“Alright, I’m gonna go. Thanks for having me over.” Changbin thanked his closest friend, always polite and courteous to Jisung for allowing him to come over so often.

“Cmon, you know you’re always welcomed here.” Jisung cleaned up their mess of popcorn and chips, tossing the bowls into the kitchen sink before helping Changbin leave. “See ya tomorrow in the studio, right?”

“You know it!” Changbin waved to Jisung as he entered his car. His car started with a hum, and the Bluetooth connected to his phone and continued where his Spotify left off. Ignoring whatever song was playing, Changbin dropped his forehead into the steering wheel as he faced the text message app in his phone. He patiently waited for you, staring at the bright screen, until he saw the familiar ellipsis text bubble appear in the lower-left corner. His face lit up with glee, and he felt his heart start beating out of his chest.

Changbin knew all too well that you had a crush on him. You made it more than obvious, stuttering over your words whenever he talked to you or hiding in your room whenever he was over. He and Jisung would joke about it in an attempt to brighten an otherwise problematic situation, but deep down, Changbin liked it. He liked the way you stared at him when he would be shirtless around your house. He liked the way you would go quiet in your room whenever he would start to talk purposefully loud about his sex life. He even liked it when he would go upstairs to use the restroom and hear your little moans of his name from inside your bedroom. He was always such a tease to you, and he couldn’t deny that he liked you too, but not in the exact same way.

Changbin lived alone. He had his own apartment downtown, and although he was known for DJing at parties, he would spend a lot of nights alone, left to his own thoughts. To combat intrusive or self-destructive thoughts, he would jerk off, obviously. And as much as he tried to focus on the pornography in front of him, he would always end up closing his eyes and letting his mind wander to you. The image of you riding him, bouncing on his cock as your chest rose and fell, was a go-to for him whenever he needed to cum fast. The thoughts of you doing sinful things with him never appeared until the beginning of this school year when he saw you carry a package to your room that was not-so-discretely a package from a sex shop. He always thought of you as extended family, being his best friend’s brother and all, but after imagining what naughty things might have been in that box, his mind was set. You were the only girl that could satisfy him.

He knew his experience would frighten you, but he wanted to ruin you more than anything. Jisung had never seen you with a partner, and although this was second-hand information, Changbin would love to take your virginity, making you cum over and over again anyway he can.

This was his chance. He never knew how to make the first move on you without Jisung noticing, but if this was how it had to be, then this is how it had to be.

You walked out to his car after sneaking past your brother, taking a seat in the passenger seat of Changbin’s car, refusing to look at him, although Changbin’s eyes were focused on you. He smiled gently, attempting to lighten the mood.

“Look, I said I’m sorry.” Changbin placed a hand on your shoulder and you gulped loudly. You could have sworn you felt your heart to a frontflip.

“Changbin,” your voice was quiet, scared of what was about to happen, “if you don’t want to do this, then I-”

“Y/n, you have no idea how much I want to fuck you.” You were speechless. You darted your eyes to meet his, and his gaze was dripping with sincerity and lust. “Let’s go back to my place. You can sleep over, I don’t care. I just want you right now.”

“Wa-want me?” You bit your bottom lip, unable to believe the current situation you were in. The boy you’ve had a crush on since middle school was about to fuck your brains out until the sun came up. Your mind was foggy, but not foggy enough to refuse Changbin’s advances.

His right hand rested on your thigh the whole 30 minute drive to his apartment, and you almost started shaking just thinking about what he was going to do to you. All your filthy fantasies were about to come to life, or you hoped they would.

Despite your excitement, the thought of Jisung finding out terrified you. Although you fought constantly, he was always protective. He would never let anyone lay a finger on his precious little sister. The only person that could bully you was him. If he knew what his best friend was about to do to you, he’d explode out of anger.

Changbin knew this. He knew damn well what he was doing would upset his best friend, but he couldn’t let this go any longer. Changbin would make lewd jokes about you infront of Jisung, each time resulting in Jisung fake-puking and threatening the older’s life if he were to ever even think of fucking you.

Ah, if only he knew.

You arrived at Changbin’s apartment. The elevator ride to the third floor was silent, but Changbin stayed close to your side the entire time. Your mind was still a mess, but Changbin’s presence made you a little bit at ease. As painfully horny as he made you, he was still your first love. You loved to be around him.

Once inside of his apartment, Changbin eased you in and welcomed you, giving you a quick “this is the living room” tour. You sat on his couch per his request and nestled back into the soft upholstery. Everything smelled like Changbin (unsurprisingly), and you almost fell asleep the second you sat down before Changbin sat next to you and leaned into your ear.

“This is your first time, right?”

You nearly jumped out of your skin. His voice was deep and hardly above a whisper. You felt so hot, and the atmosphere was so hot, and when you looked at him, he looked so hot. Holy shit. This is happening.

“Yeah, but that’s okay, right?” You leaned away from him, afraid he would pounce on you at any moment. He noticed the fear in your eyes, and his glassy eyes reverted to his soft, warm gaze. He laughed it off, gently placing his hands on your hips and pulling you onto his lap, earning a quiet yelp from you.

“Of course that’s okay, baby.” His nickname for you melted your heart. You blushed brightly, and Changbin thought it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. He felt his chest get tight as a smile stretched across his face. “Tell me if it’s too much, alright?”

“Alright, Bin.” He leaned in, and you realized you hadn’t kissed anyone since Junior prom (Don’t tell Jisung! It was a one time thing!). What if you weren’t good enough for him? What if you were bad at this? What if-

Then his lips were on yours. He waited patiently for you to get more comfortable, never moving on until you began to kiss him back. The kiss was so light and sweet, something Changbin hadn’t experienced since high school, but it honestly made his heart sing. He was the one that was supposed to be teaching you! What the fuck was this? Your hands quickly found their place on his shoulders and the back of his neck as you pulled yourself closer to him. You could feel him semi-hard under you, and you gently pushed your body down to feel more of him without thinking that he would also feel you push down on him. He pulled back and hissed, cursing under his breath. You tried to apologize, but before you could utter a word, his eye contact made you speechless.

“Eager, are we?” His smirk made your heart drop. God, he was so good looking it made your brain error. Of course you were eager, but you didn’t want to fully submit immediately. You were always a baby to him, so this could be your chance to have him see you as more mature, right?

“I just wanted to feel you.” Your sweet little voice made Changbin swoon. He knew you were innocent, and as much as he wanted to ruin you, there was an angel on his shoulder telling him to be gentle and caring. He wrapped his arms around you and brought you into another kiss, this time greedier and heavier than the last one, but you felt safe in his arms.

Changbin’s lips on your jawline felt like nirvana. He was so gentle with you, yet still domineering enough to make you entirely pliant in his arms, not like you’d know what to do if he actually let you be in control. You felt his kisses become rougher as he began sucking hickeys onto your neck. You arch your back and lean into his body, giving him full access to your neck. His hands went from supporting his weight at your sides to exploring your body, feeling you up over your shirt as slowly as possible.

“Take this off, princess.” Changbin tugged at the bottom of your shirt, hoping you get the hint. You nodded and hastily tossed your shirt off, exposing your braless chest. “Oh? Nothing on underneath?”

You looked down and covered your chest with your arms. Fuck, why were you so nervous? You’ve wanted this for years and now you’re shy? Changbin grabbed your wrists and slowly pulled you away from yourself, again exposing your chest to him. His face was unreadable aside from the casual smile that made your head spin.

“So beautiful.” Your face was as red as a tomato. His hands moved from holding your wrists to holding your hands, keeping you from covering your body. “This is what I’ve been missing out on this whole time? Damn, I should have done this sooner.”

He looks to you for any sign of discontent, but your soft puppy eyes tell him everything he needs to know, and he knows you need him. He dives his head into your chest, taking one of your nipples into his mouth, his tongue circling the sensitive bud, and takes your other breast into his hand, gripping your nipple between his fingers and twirling it gently enough to make you keen. He was so good at what he was doing, and you couldn’t help but moan and whimper, especially when his teeth began to tug at your nipple.

Switching his head from one breast to the other, he briefly makes eye contact with you, and your adorably innocent gaze is enough to make him fully hard, his cock begging to be let out of his sweatpants. You looked so good, and the spit dripping from your chest lead down to where he wanted his mouth the most: your cunt.

His heavenly touch left your chest, and you whined from the lack of stimulation before he stood up from the couch, taking you up in his arms in the process. He carried you to his bed, placing you down softly on the sheets. The smell of his overwhelmed you as you sunk into his pillows, quickly becoming blissed out and ready for more.

Changbin joined you on the bed, taking his position between your legs, kissing your tummy and moving down to the waistband of your pants. You knew what was coming, but you didn’t know if you were ready. Your heart was beating out of your chest as Changbin looks to you again, lightly tugging at your pants.

“Bin, c-can you turn off the lights?” You point to the switch on the wall, and Changbin giggles before getting up and switching them off. The street lights from outside his window illuminated the room just enough for Changbin to still see the warm glow radiating from your body. He took a second to look at you, legs spread wide and chest arched up. Your eyes were glued to Changbin too, who had a noticeably large bulge in his pants. It was then that you realized you wanted this. You were ready for anything Changbin wanted to give you, to do to you.

“You’re so fucking gorgeous, baby.” He comes back between your legs, and you raise your hips for him to slide off your shorts. The underwear you had on was nothing special, but Changbin loved it nonetheless. His fingers pressed your wet panties into your even wetter cunt, making the area fully drenched in your slick. You whined, desperately wanting more stimulation.

“Please fuck me, Bin.” You didn’t know you had it in you to be so vulgar, and neither did Changbin. His eyes go wide as he looks up at you. You were so desperate, tears were lining your eyes.

“Not yet, babe. Let me taste you first.” He slides your panties down your legs, adding them to the rest of the clothes. Now you’re fully naked, and fully at Changbin’s disposal. A single finger runs through your folds, and you whine when he begins to play with your clit, making small, calculated circles around the nerves.

While your eyes are closed, he leans down and lays on his stomach to become eye-level with your pussy. His fingers leave your clit only to be replaced by his mouth, sucking and licking at your clit. You buck into his face subconsciously, and he can tell how much you love it by the liquid dripping out of your cunt. One finger slides in with ease, and when he bends it, you arch your back even more, and Changbin quickly finds your g-spot.

“Bin, more, please.” Changbin could bust in his pants by how much you’re begging for him, but he loves it. Your voice gets so high-pitched and whiny every time you try to speak, but he loves it.

He adds two more fingers, now thoroughly stretching you out. The drag of his fingers is insane, and he can reach deeper inside you than you ever could. You push onto his hand, subtly riding his fingers as he pumps them into you. His mouth is still attached to your clit, lapping you up like it’s his last meal. You feel yourself begin to become undone, and you throw your head back from the overwhelming pleasure.

“Bin, c-close.” That’s all you can squeak out before Changbin sucks harsher at your clit, pumps faster inside you, and makes you cum on his face and fingers. Your cum coats him as you shake from the most intense orgasm you’ve experienced thus far. You moan his name loudly, and hearing you curse so much is beyond sexy to Changbin. Your sweat reflecting the street lights, your back arched with your perky titties standing up, your beautiful moans and sounds. It’s all too perfect to be true.

“Good girl.” Changbin takes his fingers out of you and sits up when you’re through your orgasm. He sucks off his fingers, tasting your sweet cum. The sight was too much, and you wanted nothing more than for Changbin to finally fuck you and take your virginity. “Is my girl ready for my cock?”

“Y-yes Changbin, please, I need your cock.” You raise your hips, this time to get his attention back to your most sensitive area. He looks down and notices your neediness. Changbin’s shirt flies over his head and joins the rest of your clothes on the floor. He’s sitting between your legs on his knees, giving you a moment to ogle at his sculpted body, which you did.

You’ve seen him shirtless before, but this time was different. Now his body was over you, not across the room or in the pool. You subconsciously reached out to him, leaning forward and running a hand down his abs, stopping at the waistband of his sweatpants.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” Changbin laughs, but you get unbelievably embarrassed in a matter of seconds, leaning back and covering your face with your arms. Changbin pins your hands above your head and leans down to kiss your blushing face all over until finishing on your lips, his tongue dancing with yours. “Don’t be shy, baby. Just calm down and let me take care of you.”

That smile. It was so sincere. You felt like he cared. Immediately, your heart burns with passion as you lean forward to kiss him while still being held down by his hands. His hands move down your arms to your chest, feeling you up one more time before you feel his hands leave your body. He breaks the kiss and leans to his bedside drawer, pulling out a condom.

Without missing a beat, he pulls his pants and boxers down his thighs, his cock springing free. It’s a lot bigger than you had imagined, but that’s okay. You wanted him more than anything, and judging by the precum leaking out of his tip, he wanted you too.

Changbin slides the condom down his shaft, making sure to pinch the tip of the rubber. He leans down and holds your hands at your sides, entwining his fingers with yours. You try to take deep breaths to calm down, but now that he feels so close, your heart feels as if it could burst out of your chest at any moment.

“This might hurt, but it will feel good, I promise.” He runs his tip through your folds, getting the head wet with your juices before lining up with your entrance. “Do you trust me, Y/n?” You nod, but that isn’t enough for Changbin. “Words, baby. Do you trust me?”

“Yes!” All you can do is whimper and squeak, a mixture of anxiety and excitement bubbling inside you. “Yes, Changbin. I trust you.”

Changbin pushes his member into you, stretching you around him. It feels like you’re about to be split in half, like your lower half could just fall off. Fuck, was it painful. But as Changbin bottoms out, he just waits. He waits for your face to go from pure pain to pure pleasure. You’re biting harshly down on your lip, holding in any whines from the pain. After a moment, you let out a moan and push down onto his cock as if it wasn’t already fully inside you.

“Bin,” your glassy eyes meet his, “move.”

His thrusts are slow and steady, making this the most enjoyable experience for you. Although you’re far from an orgasm, Changbin is scarily close. Your cunt feels like it was made for him. You’re tight, so fucking tight, but just enough for Changbin to still fit. He looks down and catches his cock disappearing into your dripping hole. The sight is filthy, and he loves it. If that wasn’t enough to make him close, your pretty moans were.

He knew your face was pretty, but your sounds, dear god your sounds. You sounded like an angel. Whenever you moaned his name, Changbin could feel his heart flutter. You sounded so damn pretty, like the best song he’d ever heard.

Changbin’s thrusts became more sloppy as he struggled to hold back his impending orgasm. You just looked so hot. The way your face scrunched up when he thrusted into you, moaning and whining with every moment. Your chest bouncing in rhythm to the sound of his balls hitting against you. It was all too much.

You felt Changbin’s cock throb inside you, and you instinctively tighten around him. With a shaky breath, he cums inside the condom. His pretty little high-pitched groans as he came made you smile, thinking to yourself, yeah, I did that.

He pulled out and disposed of the full condom. You held your arms out to him as he watched you sleepily make a little grabby hands gesture towards him. You looked so cute, how could he not cuddle with you?

Then you realized you had to pee.

But you came back as fast as you could to cuddle with him, pulling yourself into his chest, hearing his heartbeat and making your breathing in sync with his. His warmth enveloped you. You felt like you belonged there, laying in his arms with a gentle smile on your face as you were nodding off to sleep.

Changbin watched your eyes flutter shut, admiring how adorable you looked in his big arms. He wanted to talk to you, make sure you were okay, but you were already asleep by the time he collected his thoughts. All he could do was pull you closer, taking in the sweet scent of your messy hair.

Changbin was always hooking up with girls and going on dates, but nothing ever stuck. Recently, he’s been keeping to himself, and whether he’d like to admit it or not, it was because of you and his wicked thoughts. His feelings towards you for the past few months have always been of sexual attraction, nothing more. Now, actually having you in his arms, he didn’t know if his feelings were entirely rooted in lust or if he wanted something more… no. There’s no way Changbin was going to catch feelings for his best friend’s sister. No way. No fucking way.

How would Jisung react if he found out? How would he even find out? If you wouldn’t snitch, neither would Changbin, and you both subconsciously agreed to never utter a word to your brother. There was no way he could find out. No way. No fucking way.

🍓🍰🐤🍀💐🍯

An hour ago, Jisung got an alert on his phone. It was way too late for one of his booty calls to be texting him. What the fuck would alert him at this hour.

Life360

Y/n arrived at Changbin’s Apartment.

No way. No fucking way.

#stray kids smut #skz smut #stray kids #skz #kpop #kpop smut #changbin smut #seo changbin smut

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transkieran · 6 years ago

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anyway, guarma & colm-odriscoll-is-my-daddy (& friends) think abusive ships are a funny way to get under someone’s skin

JUST FYI: I woulda had this conversation in private, but @guarma keeps calling Erin a bitch with a god-complex, even though everything she accuses Erin of is something I did, and she refuses to acknowledge me. So no more private, she called me a pussy for not confronting her. Well here's the confront ig!

background context: people decided to start shitting on the Yehaw Function server again in another server (let’s say ‘A’ bc I do not wish to drag the owner into this, they were rarely online). @ssupeck21 thought it was perfectly fine to mock the gender and race of a two-spirited native trans guy. nice transphobia and racism there!

considering i remarked on it, they realized i knew him and suspected me of leaking the above screenshot to the YF server. i had already left this server at the end of february over several reasons, including erin’s server becoming my main one. i’m also reasonably sure i have mentioned no longer being in YF at some point. damage done: kate (guarma) and pongo ( @colm-odriscoll-is-my-daddy ) now think i’m “a spy” for YF. (ironic because @ssupeck21 let @jennyxbeans into erin’s server bc she was spying for jenn. and more irony later)

as proven in DM to someone later (oh no, a spied image?), they had the amazing idea to bait me and erin with something that is a massive trigger for me (bully/victim ships). some weirdness: by that time, i’d only made about 2 b/k posts on my blog, neither of which mentioned my trauma i’m pretty sure. erin meanwhile, wasn’t even in the original convi from the first screenshot, though she has mentioned she finds b/k gross.

so whilst this in its entirety is already immature in itself (really? you think someone is sending screenshots and wanna get ‘revenge’ when you constantly rely on getting screenshots yourself? yes i know someone leaked you screenshots of YF, kate). but also: for someone who talked about being abused and having anxiety, she should know better than use an abusive ship to get back at someone. because i’m 99% sure she knows b/k is a trigger for me; whilst not on my blog, i have had plenty of rants and vents in servers about how b/k is not good for my mental health and that it will make me panic.

conversation #1 (i do not have screenshots of this): someone asked what everyone’s ships are in rdr2. bill/kieran gets mentioned, at some point i put rooWut (a disgusted looking emote) and remark something about abusive gay ships being cute to them. it gets glossed over, i leave.

conversation #2. the conversation moves to the nsfw channel, where they pin the message in the above screenshot. ha ha , bully/victim ships are a funny joke! conversation moves on to arthur and other things until Pongo clearly feels like she wants to force a reaction out of me and/or erin. (living dead girl is erin, i am dan’s achy breaky heart).

at this point, my anxiety spikes and i put something along the lines of “my fist up your ass would look cute” in the vent chat of Erin’s server. NSFW with b/k is not good for me, at all. it made me flashback to something, i’m basically just trying to not have a panic attack. but ! ofc , why stop now.

pongo makes another comment, now not under a spoiler tag and clearly with the context of the DM to get another reaction out of me. erin puts a completely unrelated image to try and divert the conversation, because i’m like entirely losing it at this point---but kate and pongo think it’s hilarious to talk about actually shipping it and kate (micah bell’s dumb hair in the screenshots) is all “omg i wanna write a smut now for them”.

also: my nickname in this server includes ‘trans kieran’ at this point , either as just my url or like “lion ♡ trans kieran”. they all know i am a gay trans guy, even if some of them currently like to pretend they don’t know me. (hi, @morlawny who doesn’t even wanna say my name at this point despite being all nice in erin’s server.)

i can’t entirely remember my own message, nor do i have screenshots of it because i send it and left and they deleted it like straight after it seems (because an older screenshot, from the day itself, also didn’t have my message anymore). i left because at that point, i lost all ability to think straight. because someone can remark on b/k before and they’ll still be all “ha ha funny!”

at this point, in erin’s server, two things happen. one friend of kate, who isn’t in the server this happened in, asks if she ships bill/kieran and kate admits her plan to just trigger me. because of this, kate starts acting like the victim and making me out like the bad guy who’s shittalking her and refuses to talk to her--which, during a panic attack and with my feelings very clear, i don’t need to.

secondly, another friend of kate decides my trauma is funny and starts to send kate (on request) screenshots of the vent conversation in erin’s server, starting from the goddamn my fist up your ass comment. the conversation also includes details of my trauma. my trauma is being send around like gossip.

also this happens in the server i left and i get send it:

i dunno what planet anyone is living on but, apparently my melt down was only good for one thing: getting mocked. “kieran’s coochie” is transphobic as fuck when you’re laughing at a trans guy getting upset over bill/kieran. especially when it’s very clear i hc kieran as trans. yet, pongo, wolfy ( @soulheartthewolf ) and kate seem to think it’s fucking hilarious.

kate and pongo then try to play the “we were just joking!” card. when everyone i’ve had read those screenshots agrees nothing about it reads as a joke, and we’re now very sure they weren’t joking about, they were being vile and malicious. (but hey, what’s to expect from someone who says they’d fuck a fictional racist if he was real! that’s ... excusing racism, kate).

(guarma is micah bell? you mean my husband ;; pongo is arthur morgan is an incel. the other person is the artist who drew young micah, idk their url anymore)

“my mocking of the Bill/Kieran ship” I’m so sorry, Kate, but nothing about nsfw b/k and wanting to write a fic about it, reads as mocking. This entire “it’s just a joke!” doesn’t diminish the fact that you triggered a panic attack. Yes, I shittalked you, because I felt like it was goddamn deserved for "joking” about an abusive ship in a way that didn’t read as a joke. because after I left neither of you got the damn hint and just went straight for the transphobia. It’s not get together and hate guarma, it’s “lion has a panic attack and will actually react insanely aggressively about the things that upset him”. You can turn and twist this into you being the victim all you want, but you ain’t. You’re a pathetic example of a 19 year old who thinks it’s funny to trigger flashbacks and panic attacks. I didn’t talk to you, because at the time the only thing I would’ve probably said, which is also what I’m saying now, is: go shove an entire cactus up your ass, you pathetic cunt of a human being.

Leave Erin out of this, it’s goddamn hilarious you keep going after a cis bi woman instead of after me, a gay trans guy, and god I fucking wonder why.

You interact with people who think they can just be racist and transphobic towards anyone they like ( @ssupeck21 ), with people who’ll willing send you all the screenshots you want, with people who send anon hate ( @jennyxbeans ), you’re treating trauma and abuse like a joke and then have the gal to be all “i’d never because i have anxiety!” No. Own up to your shit.

(I could go on in this post about how she’s just as bad a shittalking, leaked screenshot-wanting piece of shit but hey, the post is very long already so whatever).

edit: i have deleted screenshot leaking accusations towards morlawny bc i can’t actually prove them but i’m keeping up the thing where you decided to be all nice to me in servers, but then turned around and were all “idk kate didn’t say any of that” (i literally know u were there for those conversations, your name in screenshots!) and tried to defend her constantly in a DM with someone.

#red dead redemption #guarma #userguarma #idk if she has a tag lmao #colm-odriscoll-is-my-daddy

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diariesofana · 6 years ago

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Jan 18,2019 suicide

You know what’s the worst part of it all? It’s not the pain, it’s not the fact that I want to die.. it’s that I physically can’t do it. I can’t kill myself. I don’t want to live but the fear of attempting to commit suicide and failing to die then complications occurring instead. Or just failing and those around me know what i tried to do. I’ve gone through so much in my life a lot of mental abuse by literally everyone I love. I’ve had no structure in my and most of all, the majority of my life I grew up not knowing what love is. Till this day I don’t know what unconditional love feels like. The moment God sent me the purest form of unconditional love I killed it. I know my mom is right that i will amount to nothing. I can try so hard but in the end I am nothing. I see so many people become everything they wish and hoped for and here I am at 24 trying to learn things about life one should learn at 7. I try to love myself but how can i? When I’m being torn down by my own mother. And always have. I was physically abused by two older men. My family will never know about because they just know to throw it in my face later on.. what will my mom say? Oh.. “ you deserved that” yeah no, exactly those words. And then, she’ll also saying something along the lines of “you provoked it” sorry it’s not my fault that I, uncontrollably developed boobs at an uncomfortably young young age. Two men. Two different times. But, still had a huge impact in my development and life.

How about my entire life growing up with two parents that hate each other? I remember being 5 and my mom took a knife to my dad after throwing the coffee table across the room? She was pointing it to my dads stomach with the point of the knife actually touching his skin. I was fucking 5 years old. How about it being spring and seeing all the families outside together, how i longed for that. Somewhere along 10-now i lost the desire of having my family close and lost my values that were naturally instilled in me of being family oriented. Why would i be? When i will never have that. I tried again and quickly came to realize as much as i try and crave it, that is a battle i will lose. I am the only one in this family who still tries.. everyone is out living their own life separately. I hate it but, thats what i mean by no one truly loves me. How about the fact that I didn’t even have a relationship with my dad until I ran away. It took me running away st the age of 15 for my dad to realize hey maybe build a relationship with my daughter instead of being such a dick all the time. Before that, i would look st my dad and feel like i was living with a stranger. I didn’t know much about him other than he works and comes home to fight. I was scared of him.

Growing up i was constantly put down. No shock as to why I don’t have any self esteem. But it’s blamed on me not on the people who shot it down to the ground. No, it’ll never be my moms fault. She didn’t call me ugly fat and worthless starting st the age of 7, maybe even before who knows but my (according to her) indent stupid brain can’t recall. I had an eating disorder because of her calling me fat and constantly comparing me to others. Did you know she compared me to an actress that was 25 years old? Thalia while i was 7-10. I felt shitty about myself because i didn’t look like her. My body was not shaped like hers (obviously i am 10 years old!!!!!!) so i developed anoerxia nervosa later on to bulimia. Of course though, she doesn’t know that. She doesn’t know how her words affected me so deeply and until this day. But it wasn’t only her. My whole school called me every white slut smut name in the book and not only my school, but my dad too. Imagine, the person who is supposed to uplift you and wipe tears away from your face because you’re getting bullied is only contributing to the pain? Now, i knew i wasn’t a slut so what those kids had to say didn’t really affect me.... because let’s be serious i was being called much worse st home but, what when my own father called me that which such disgust too, it fucked me up. I have never been the smart girl, the funny girl, the cool girl. I’ve only been the sexy slutty one.

To all the boys I’ve loved. You contributed to all my traumas and then, created new ones. Miguel, you mentally abused me.. but what was new because I’m used to it right? My whole life. Wrong. It’s different because to some extent I thought love still existed and i would find it in a man since i could not at home. Only to my surprise, again like i always am in my life I was wrong. But the pain and traumas he caused are minute compared to everything I endured during my 6 year relationship with Zaire. Only adding on to my insecurities. I do want to add none of these men are responsible for adding on or creating traumas because, they didn’t know my past. He made me feel dumb, boring, not good enough, that if i got fat he wouldn’t be sexually attracted to me anymore. His words not mine. I also traveled down memory lane to bulimia on that one. He was confused about his feelings towards me and if he wanted to be with me.. which made me spiral out of control because yet again, unstable love. I’ve never had someone stable in my life with their feelings. Not even my dad. I hit the lowest of rock bottoms i had anxiety 24/7 i started self medicating to numb the pain.. no LITERSLLY NUMB THE PAIN. How does one do that for hours st a time? I took sleeping medicine to sleep through the pain only no, because i would have nightmares about it. But still it was fictional and st the end of the day id rather sleep and go through that than be up tempted to text/call or lurk on ig only to find out yes being thirsty for Jasmine. It worked until i would wake up with my heart racing a million miles an hour and it would all hit me, all the anxiety i slept through would hit me as soon as a woke up. Like roll over anxiety.oop bitch you didn’t use up all your minutes during this time but don’t worry we will roll over all the pain anxiety and sadness so you get it all st once as soon as you wake up :) what a tough two and a half years to be with someone that doesn’t love you. Life is great but it gets better. 3 years later god sends you a gift from heaven and both or you guys decide to kill it. Kill an innocent human being, a baby. Because he never loved you or his future child enough to go through with it.

Pregnancy - wow. The second hardest thing I’ve had to go through. Trust me when i say during this time you want to be with someone who truly loves you because it is such a vulnerably time in a women’s life. It’s a beautiful chapter if gone through with the correct person. Sadly, of course i chose the wrong one or should i say, god had a different plan for me because i did not chose to get pregnant that day. Morning sickness is horrible and the lack of energy was brutal. The back pain was on another level. But what was the worst part of it all was the half ass boyfriend i had. No support. No love. No patience. You know what takes place for the first hardest thing I’ve gone through in my life? Abortion. It’s not what people make it seem online, it’s worse. No one goes into detail about abortion and it start from the proper counseling. I get it, i don’t solely blame them because st the end of the day they have x amount of girls a day and most of them have made up their mind about getting the procedure done, also what more can they do if they ask if you’re sure and you say yes? Not much more, but i wish more women would share their stories before during and after. I was lucky enough to document my emotions the day before after and during. The physiological affects it has on you takes a huge toll on your will to live. Regret is my sidekick. Itlll always be there with me. The physical affects are worse too. Omg the sharp pains from where they scraped you’re uterus... a constant reminder of your regret let me tell you. Even months later almost a year i still sometimes feel those scrapes. I don’t even want it to go away though because i will hold on to any reminder of what used to be. That fucked my entire life up. A decision a man made.

Now, i don’t believe in love. I don’t believe they there is someone out there who will love me for me nor do i want it. I am so fearful of ever loving someone again that i just push everyone away. Imagine me going through another guy fake love me again. Love comes in different many forms but, i chose to love things that will never leave me. Things that can’t reciprocate love back. I am so tired of living my life in hostile negative regretful environments but i have tethered those emotions in my heart and mind. It’s made me stronger but in the name of pain? In the name of trauma? In the new of never being able to truly love yourself to its full capacity or even a capacity that you are able to feel confidence? Moving out and starting my life fresh new with different people will be the only way. Yes, finally running away from my problems. Family doesn’t aleahs equal blood sadly i have finally came to terms with that.

God, there’s nothing in this world that i want wore than to see my baby again. To meet with him/her and to explain my decision. To be with him/her that’s all i want. I know the price i have to pay on their earth for making that decision is going to be a cruel punishment i have to fully go through. But emotionally i give up and physically too. God i just ask that tonight instead of taking a life away of someone who will truly be missed or who is accomplishing something or will in the future.. someone who had a life full of love, take mine instead. Please.

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problematicc-favs · 8 years ago

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water park - sincerely three x reader smut (and like 1,000 words of fluff)

request: okay but like sincerely three and reader having a waterpark day and she does something like pull connor into and he just gets pissed™ and pushes them against one of the jets and keeps teases them and keeps saying "you're in for it when we get home" and jared and evan help and then they keep teasing her on the slides and in the water play thing and when home kinky shit ensures plz plz write this i'll give u houseplants and cuddles

OH BOY OH BOY THIS IS FUN IG oh,, tags @spicy-nug-boi

Word count; 3455

TW; fem reader (IM SORRY I ALWAYS FEEL AWFUL), daddy kink lowkey, teasing!! in public!!, car rides, begging, lowkey orgasm delay/denial, idek?, poly relationship,its longer than i intended, SEX AND SMUT OBVS, PORN WITH MILD PLOT, jared kleinmeme is an actual meme, evan is 11/10, bad comedy

When Jared Kleinman had suggested that you, Connor and Evan go to the waterpark to relax and make the best out of the final days of Summer, you had immediately thought it was a great idea. Spending a day with your boyfriends, just escaping all the stress and other shit that was cluttering your mind was exactly what you needed, and while it took a bit of… convincing to get Connor on board with the idea, he was prompted to say yes when you and the two other boys promised him to make it worth-while for him. It didn’t hurt your case when you reminded him of the prospect of seeing you running around in a bikini.

So, a few days after everything had been agreed upon, the four of you sat in the car, blasting music. It was Jared’s turn on the aux (which was something everyone else always dreaded), so the current song playing was the Little Einstein’s theme, much to your dismay. He sang along gleefully, dancing along and poking you. “C’mon y/n. Sing with me. Sing with meeee. Babe. Y/N. The song is almost over.”

You tried to ignore him at first, but eventually gave in, mumbling along to the song which you sadly knew the entirety of. You could blame Jared for that.

“Zooming through the sky, Little Einstein’s. YEAHHH!”

The song ended and he began to furiously scroll through Spotify to find the next song.

“You two are children,” Connor commented, almost endearingly.

“Got it!” Jared exclaimed after a few moments.

“Please don’t play trash again.” You begged quietly. “I never play trash. I only play tasteful, cultured music, my dear.”

There was a thick silence before you heard the unmistakable first notes of Deepthroat by Cupcakke.

No one said a thing until,

“HUMP ME, FUCK ME—”

“Oh my god Jared.”

“O-Oh. Woah.”

“DADDY BETTER MAKE ME CH—”

“Make it stop. Stop.”

“NO WAY, BABY.” Jared shook his head furiously. “YOU BETTER HUMP ME—”

“Jared I am begging you. Stop. You’re scaring Evan.”

“He’s not scaring me!”

“Fine. You’re scaring me.”

Jared turned away from you, opting to sing to Connor instead. “LICK LICK LICK LICK, I WANNA EAT YOUR DICK.”

You and Evan both buried your faces in your hands, faces completely red.

“Oh c’mon guys! It’s my favorite song. At least pretend to like it.”

When you finally arrived at the water park (after what felt like a very long, very painful car ride), you ran out of the car as fast as you could, much more excited then you anticipated you would be. The boys followed not too far behind you, and you couldn’t tell if it was because they were equally as excited or they just needed to keep up with you. Either way, when you made it to the gate of the waterpark and scanned your tickets in, you and Jared were both exhausted.

“Why the fuck is the parking lot so far away from the entrance?” You questioned, already out of breath.

“Because life is pain and the company who runs this place gives no fucks.” Jared half-joked. “It wasn’t that far. I mean it was far, but you guys look like you ran a fucking marathon.” Connor chuckled. “Nerds.”

“Not all of us have fucking tree legs, Connor.” You quipped back.

“This place looks cool.” Evan looked around. You cocked your head to the side slightly. “Ev, have you ever been to a water park before?” He shook his head gently, shrugging. “I think that I might’ve gone with um, my dad.. when I was younger? I’m not sure though.”

“So, we might be your first time?” Jared wiggled his eyebrows. “I-I guess so.” Evan laughed.

“Okay, less standing around and belittling people with short legs,” you looked at Connor, “Or making stupid first time jokes.” You glared at Jared.

“And more time stripping off your clothing so we can actually have fun. Let’s go motherfuckers.” You laughed, Connor shook his head disapprovingly, a small smile playing on his lips.

“No but for real.” You added, quickly wiggling out of your athletic shorts that covered your bathing suit. Jared began to ‘sensually’ sing the sax riff from ‘careless whisper’ as you pulled your shirt off. You shot him a death glare before fast walking towards the wave pool.

You hopped in happily quickly followed by Evan and Jared. You splashed them, giggling softly, and Evan splashed you back a bit harder. You squealed slightly, and it ended up becoming a full on war between the three of you. When it had calmed down, and you had made a three way truce, you glanced over at Connor, who was just chilling off to the side, still wearing his clothes.

“Connnnnn,”

You said mischievously.

He glanced at you, sensing the hint of mischief in your voice.

“Whatttttt?” He asked. “Why aren’t you playing with us?” You frowned childishly. “Yeah Connor. Whyyyy?” Jared whined mockingly. “Because I don’t want to.” Connor shrugged, smiling slightly. “But /we/ want you to.” You pouted.

He shrugged again, and you pulled yourself out of the pool walking over to him. “Come on. Let’s go. Now.” You grabbed his hand and attempted to pull him towards the water. He didn’t budge. Damn you were weak.

“Connor. Pleaseee.” Evan said sweetly. You glanced at the two boys in the pool, getting an idea.

You mouthed the words ‘distract him’, and Jared immediately began to bug Connor about how he ‘wasn’t any fun’. Connor was obviously getting mildly annoyed, and you were casually holding his hand and walking the both of you towards to water, and he didn’t seem notice. Thank god. After a few seconds you cut into the conversation.

“Hey, Murphy.” You said smugly.

Mid-way through his attempt to turn around to look at you, you gave him a hard shove into the pool, giggling and then jumping in practically on top of him.

When you arose from beneath the surface of the water you were met with both Jared and Evan laughing their asses off while Connor ran a hand through his hair. “Oh my fucking god, Y/N. Y-You fucking—oh boy you fucked up.” Jared laughed. And you knew he was right.

“Woops,” You squeaked out, looking at Connor.

And holy fuck.

He looked hot. Like, hotter than usual.

The thin fabric of his tee-shirt clung to his skin, his hair was soaking wet, and the look in his eyes was one of pure lust, and some anger. It took all your self-control not to kiss him as hard as you could, or pull him back to the car and let him fuck your brains out.

“What the fuck are you staring at?” His voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you looked away quickly, blushing.

“Do you think you’re funny?” Connor questioned. You met his eyes, holding back a giggle and shaking your head no.

“I think you do.” He said simply, walking towards you. You stepped back, and he took another step forward until he had backed you against the wall of the pool. “It’’s not funny, y/n.” He said softly before leaning in to kiss you, his hands pressing against your hips. You could feel some of his hair fall into his face and brush against you own. You lifted your hand to push it out of his face but one of his hands shot up from your hip and caught yours, pushing it back down to your side and holding it there.

“What if I just fucked you right here, with everyone watching. Hm? What if I fucked you until you were screaming my name. Would you like that, baby?” He growled in your ear, his lips attaching to the hollow of your neck, leaving a single hickey. “You’re in for it when we get home, princess.”

His hand slipped behind you to squeeze your ass before he moved past you and hopped out of the water. Once you recovered from the encounter you looked to Jared and Evan with wide eyes that read ‘what the fuck just happened’.

Instead of saying anything to you, they both just looked at each other with stupid fucking smirks on their faces. “Ooooh. Y/N’s in troubleee.” Jared said cockily, grabbing Evan’s hand and winking at you. You rolled your eyes and scoffed. “Fuck off, Kleinman.”

For awhile things seemed normal. Connor even decided to hang out with you on his own accord.

Every now and then, though, one of the boys would slide their hand up your thigh, or whisper all the things they wanted to do to you in your ear. It was an understatement to say that you were incredibly frustrated.

You guys had migrated to the kids play area now, because as Evan had so masterfully put it

“THERE ARE WATER GUNS AND WE’RE BASICALLY CHILDREN.”

Currently, you were deciding teams for your water gun battle. “I-I call Evan!” You said quickly, thinking that doing anything with Connor would result in more teasing, and that the situation would be similar with Jared.

“Fine. Connor and I will kick your assess.”

“Kleinman—”

“Don’t listen to him, y/n. He’s just a bully.” Evan teased, and you smiled slightly.

“Alright, bitches. 3, 2, 1, GO!”

You began to frantically run around, and just to your luck you ended up running directly into Jared. Although you were pretty sure he had run into you on purpose, because before you could start to run away he grabbed you by the waist and pulled your body against his. He moved his body against yours roughly, grinding into you. Your head fell back slightly and you almost succumbed to the feeling of someone finally giving you some sort of stimulation, but you heard Evan scream and you remembered..

You were at war.

“That’s against the fucking rules, Kleinman!” You whined, pushing away. “We never set any rules.” Connor called out. “Fucking hell.” You mumbled to yourself, squirting Jared directly in the face with the water gun before running to help Evan.

After you had chased Connor away you and Evan were ‘hiding’ behind a panel, both mildly out of breath. “Hey, y/n,” Evan said innocently. You glanced at him. “Yeah?”

“I love you.” He smiled cheekily. You chuckled and smiled back. “I love you too, Ev.”

“Oh geez, good. Because I’m sorry about this.” You couldn’t process his words before you felt someone come up behind you and kiss and press a kiss on the side of your neck, and then Evan’s lips were on yours, muffling your confused moan.

God damnit, you had been betrayed.

Evan was gently moving his fingers over your clothed clit and you gasped into the kiss. You had determined the person behind you was Connor, due to the hair and the height, and he was still working his lips down your neck and shoulders. Evan’s fingers wandered dangerously under the hem of your bathing suit bottom and you were practically dry humping his hand as you desperately searched for some form of relief. “I bet you could cum like this, fucking yourself onto Evan’s hand. That’s how badly you want us, isn’t it?” Connor said condescendingly. God, you hated giving him the satisfaction of seeing you like this. He wasn’t wrong, though.

When you thought Evan was finally going to be merciful and help you get off you heard screeching in the distance.

“Excuse me, sir?! Have you seen my beautiful significant others? Yes, I lost them! Well there’s one that’s about.. yeah like this tall, fucking very tall I know, yeah he has brown hair and it’s long. You could mistake him for a female if you only give him a quick glanc—oh you haven’t seen them? Oh. Thanks anyway.” A pause before,

“CONNOR?! EVAN?! Y/N?? GUYS I’M SCARED BEING ALL ALONE.”

Evan pulled his hand away from you and you let out a whimper at the loss of contact. “Kleinman just ruins everything, doesn’t he?” Connor joked to you.

“We’re over here Jared!” He called out, and you heard Jared gasp.

“MY LOVERS!!” He yelled dramatically, running towards you.

“We’re going home.” You said as soon as he was in earshot.

“Wait, what?” He and Evan asked simultaneously.

“We’re going home. Now.” You gulped, trying to sound firm in your words even though your legs were almost shaking.

“But babe, I’m having fun.” Connor fake pouted.

“Fuck off, Murphy. We’re going.” Your voice cracked slightly, and you were incredibly embarrassed, but you weren’t going to let it get to you. You walked away from the group, grabbed your bag that held your clothes and phone, and began to walk to the exit of the park with a purpose.

“Are you guys coming?” You called over your shoulder.

“We don’t have much of a choice.”

You made it to the car and unlocked it, hopping into the passenger seat. After a few seconds the boys all filed in, Connor opting to drive.

“You better fucking speed home, Connor.”

You mumbled, leaning against the door of the car and crossing your legs.

“Last time I checked you weren’t the one in charge.” Connor replied, pulling out of the parking lot.

You went silent, twirling your hair around your finger.

“You good, Y/N?” Evan asked, knowing perfectly well that you were not ‘good’.

“I’m fine.”

“Why won’t you come sit with us back here?”

“Because.”

“Because what?”

“Because I don’t trust you.” You half joked.

“Ouch. I’m offended.” Jared deadpanned.

Connor chuckled, placing a hand gently on your knee. You shivered slightly, and he moved his hand up to grip your thigh and pull your legs off of each other so they were uncrossed. He kept his eyes on the road while his fingers traced the edges of your thighs.

“You’re gonna make us crash.” You warned. “Pay attention to driving.”

Connor’s hand stalled its movements for a moment.

“You’re right,” he glanced at back at Jared and Evan, “Go sit with them.” He commanded.

You opened your mouth to protest but he cut you off.

“It’s better if you just comply, baby. The better behaved you are now, the less daddy will have to punish you later.”

So, without another word you wiggled your way through the gap between the passenger and driver’s seat, plopping down face first in between your two boyfriends. “Ouch.” You mumbled, attempting to readjust so that you could actually sit correctly. “Jesus fucking Christ you nerd.” Jared laughed. You felt a pair of hands help you sit up, and you sighed happily when you were able to rest your head against Evan’s shoulder. You intertwined your fingers with his, and giggled when Jared began to leave sweet kisses down your cheek and neck. “You’re gonna be so sore when we’re done with you tonight, princess.” He mumbled against your skin, and the pure prospect of it was enough to make your breath hitch. Evan hooked his fingers under the bottoms of your swim suit and ran two fingers up and down your heat. He smiled and pulled them away, holding them up for both you and Jared to see. You were almost ashamed to see that they were soaked with your arousal. You had barley been touched, yet you were somehow still incredibly turned on. “You’re so wet for us, Y/N,” Evan said softly. “Is this what kind of effect we have on you, beautiful? You’re so fucking needy for us.” Jared continued, running a hand through your hair and stopping mid-way through to tug it.

And he kissed you, roughly, a hand tangled in your hair while Evan picked up where he left off, his fingers returning to your aching core and sliding into your heat with ease. You moaned into Jared’s lips, groaning softly as you bucked your hips towards Evan’s hand for more friction. “God—fuck. I need more.” You breathed out. “Don’t get greedy now, love.” Connor reminded you. Evan was now curling two fingers in and out of you as you moaned his name, and it took a whole lot of control not to beg for one of the boys to fuck you right there.

Right as you felt your legs began to shake as you were ready to go over the edge, you heard the sound of a seat belt clicking open. “Fuck.” You gasped to yourself, knowing that it only meant your orgasm would be delayed once again. “Let’s go.” Connor instructed you and the other boys. Evan looked at you apologetically, kissing you quickly before getting out of the car. Jared got out as well, leaving you alone, breathing heavily. “Are you coming?” He yelled from the doorstep of the house. You shot him a look of pure desperation, and he laughed, walking back to you and pulling you out of the car. He pushed you against the metal of the door and kissed you, mummering the word ‘jump’ against your lips. You did as he said, wrapping your legs around his waist. He carried you inside, leaving kisses on your jawline as he did so. “You’re not as weak as I t-thought you were, Kleinman.” You teased in between moans. “Don’t make me drop you.” He scoffed.

When he eventually did put you down you were immediately met with Connor’s lips on yours. He was rough, demanding, as he pulled away and basically dragging you upstairs into the bedroom, where Evan already was, only in his boxers. Jared had apparently shed all of his clothing as he was walking into the room, because he was on top of Evan in an instant, his hands roaming down Evan’s body while Evan’s did the same to him. You couldn’t tear your gaze away from the sight of your boyfriends. When you eventually did look away you glanced to your side to see Connor pulling his shirt off, his hair messy.

Jesus fucking Christ, no matter how many times you had been with the three of them you were always overwhelmed. Connor approached you, kissing your skin as he pulled off the fabric that was covering your chest. Jared moaned Evan’s name loudly, and your eyes shot over to them. You swore you could physically feel yourself fall apart. Evan’s lips were around Jared’s dick as he contently bobbed his head, and Jared’s eyes were shut tightly as deep moans tumbled out of his lips. Connor led you to the bed and pushed you forward so that you were bended over the edge. Jared chuckled weakly and threaded a hand through you hair. You could feel Connor’s tip teasing at your entrance and you shuddered. “Please..” You begged. “Why should I, y/n. Why shouldn’t I just tease you until you cry?” Connor asked tauntingly.

“Oh—fuck Ev, just like that— come on, Connor. You made your point, be merciful.” Jared choked out. “W-What Jared said.” You agreed. “You’re lucky Kleinman is such a softie for you.” Connor mumbled, pushing into you without warning. You cried out slightly, and Jared’s grip on your hair tightened. “Fuck, baby. You feel so good.” Connor groaned. His thrusts sped up exponentially, and he gave you barley anytime to adjust. He pushed your shoulder’s down, keeping your body pressed against the mattress as he fucked you. You could hear muffled moans from Evan and not so muffled moans from Jared. From your peripheral vision you could see Evan jerking himself off and grinding against the mattress.

“Fuck, Ev, babyboy, I’m gonna cum.” Jared moaned, and his hand twitched, tugging on your hair. Your legs began to shake in the wake of your oncoming orgasm, and you whimpered loudly. “I can feel that you’re gonna cum baby. Come on. Cum for daddy like the slut that you are. Fuck, you’re so tight.” Connor rambled, obviously also close to coming undone. As you came you could hear Evan doing the same as he whimpered your name. Connor’s thrusts began to become irregular and after a few more moments he pulled out and came on your back, rasping out a string of profanities.

The four of you collapsed, gasping and laughing, high on the feeling of overwhelming love. There was a short period where no one spoke, until Connor groaned and rolled off of the bed, walking to the bathroom and grabbing a towel. “Let’s clean this up,” he mumbled to you, wiping your back off before tossing the towel to the side and wrapping his arms around you. Jared and Evan soon joined the cuddle party. You nuzzled your face into Evan’s neck happily and hummed a random tune that was stuck in your head.

Everything was peaceful until—

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“Are you humming Deepthroat?”

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